7 Life Lessons for Teenagers 💡

Hey y’all,

First off: thank you so much for four million subscribers! I’m incredibly grateful for your support and the community we’ve grown over the past few years.

This week, I want to break down one of my recent videos where I cover seven life lessons for teenagers.

In this video, I draw on my experiences growing up and reflect on some of the things I wish I could tell my younger self. Now look, I’m not some elder with all the answers to life, but I am past my teenage years. So let’s dive into some of my realizations.

Lesson #1: Embrace the Weird

When you’re a teenager, the last thing you wanna be called is “weird.” The desire to fit in—to act, talk, and dress like those around you—is unreal.

But the truth is, the things that make you weird are the things that will make you successful.

For example, in middle school, I was into web development, gaming, and writing. Alone, none of these three interests is weird. But when I combined them to start my own gaming blogs, people were a little judgmental.

And look, I get it haha. Writing about games is a nerdy thing to do.

But this weird hobby enabled my love for computer science—a field I explored further in high school and eventually studied in college.

But let’s put success aside, which is a bit superficial. More importantly, embracing your “weird” hobbies and interests (which I promise are less weird than you think they are) will bring about joy and a sense of fulfillment.

Don’t let anyone’s judgement take that away from you.

Lesson #2: Everything Is a Skill

I’m super passionate about this one! Literally everything—and I mean everything—is a skill.

You have two kinds of skills: hard skills and soft skills. Everyone thinks that hard skills are trainable whereas soft skills are attributes you’re simply born with.

This couldn’t be further from the truth.

Soft skills, such as communication, leadership, and even creativity are things you can train. These are abilities and skills you can practice and hone over time.

If you want to become better at leadership, put yourself into situations where you have to exercise quick thinking or rally together people behind a cause. You’re going to feel uncomfortable at first, but over time you’ll find yourself acquire the attributes of a “natural-born leader.”

If you want to become at communication so you can nail an interview or a presentation, you can practice using established frameworks. And over time you’ll find yourself naturally become an engaging and thoughtful speaker.

I think the world like to put people into boxes. Introverted vs. extroverted. Analytical vs. creative. And it imposes these boxes at a very young age, which can be detrimental to your self-development.

When you’re young, keep your mind open. Quite literally think outside the box. Put yourself in positions where society wouldn’t normally place you, and you’ll probably be surprised by what you’re capable of.

Lesson #3: It’s Never Too Late

When it comes to hard skills, young people mistakenly assume that they have run out of time. Look, if you’re 17, it’s not too late to learn how to code, paint, or do almost anything.

Here’s what I think happens. By the time you reach your later teenage years, you start to see some of your peers crush it in a certain area, and you think to yourself, “Wow, they’ve literally been doing this since they were seven, eight, nine years old.” So it feels too late to get started.

But you are literally seventeen. You could pick up a brand new skill and become world-class at it by your mid 20s.

Or you could start in your 20s and become an expert by your 30s.

You could start in your 30s and become an expert by your 40s.

As you get older, it’ll become abundantly clear that you’re not on the same timeline as other people. There will always be areas where others are ahead, and you’re a bit behind.

And the opposite will also be true.

You will be ahead in some areas where others are trying to catch up.

Lesson #4: You’re More Capable Than You Realize

Again, we’re pushing back against this idea of putting yourself in a box or constraining your actions based on self-limiting beliefs.

Yes, many smart people exist. For example, you have high school students winning science fair awards. You have college students doing groundbreaking, grad-level work. You have young adults raising millions of dollars for their startups.

But if you pull the curtain back, if you listen to the stories of these extremely accomplished people, you’ll realize that their success has more to do with character and perseverance instead of innate intelligence.

And this should be an extremely reassuring lesson to you as a teenager because it opens up a whole new world of possibilities.

It proves that you have enough time to start from square one and achieve some of your most ambitious goals and dreams.

Lesson #5: Be Explicit

If you messed up, own up to it.

If you don’t want to do something, just say so.

Communicating clearly and quickly is such an important skill to master as you get older.

And it’s a much harder skill than people expect because people are afraid to be honest. And not in an insidious or manipulative way, but because they don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings.

But in the long run, ghosting people or beating around the bush—even if you’re doing so for seemingly selfless reasons—will do more harm than good. You’ll chip away at others’ trust and seem unreliable.

I’ll be honest—I’ve had to learn this lesson the hard way on a couple of occasions. I know it sounds simple and obvious, but very few people have internalized it.

Lesson #6: Life is a Presentation Game

In other words, your ability to succeed in this world depends more on how you present yourself instead of the skills you have.

Whether you’re running for leadership roles, applying to college, finding jobs, everything comes down to how you can package and sell your story—how you can inspire and motivate someone to vouch for you.

This is a lesson I realized in senior year of high school as I was writing my college essays. I very quickly realized my ability to stand out to top schools depended on how I could frame my activities, accomplishments, and backstory in a way that would appeal to an admissions reader.

And no, I’m not saying the goal here is to lie or exaggerate, or to pretend to be someone you’re not. Rather, it’s to reflect on your story and figure out which elements to convey and how.

Lesson #7: Nurture Relationships

I’m not talking about professional networking. I’m talking about family and friends.

The older you get, the harder it becomes to stay connected with people, and maintaining relationships becomes more of an active exercise.

This will first happen when you move into college. Suddenly, you’ll have way less time to talk to your parents, but it’ll be up to you to check in with them.

When you graduate college and get your first job, you’ll suddenly have less time to talk to your friends. But that doesn't mean you have to sever the connections. Be mindful of your new situation and make the effort to stay in touch.

Personally, I’ve been hopping on FaceTime calls with my hometown friends every few weeks, and doing so has been a great way for us to keep in touch. (We actually started a movie club where we discuss a new movie every week. Pretty fun, ngl.)

Hope that helped! Which of these lessons resonated with you most? Feel free to DM me on Instagram to let me know (@goharsguide).

If you want additional study advice, come join my Discord! We have a global community of students helping each other succeed in school. Would love to see you there.

And if you need help with college applications, check out Next Admit! We have a team of Ivy League consultants eager to help you navigate the admissions process.

I’ll see you next week!

Best,
Gohar