How to Care Less About What People Think 🧘‍♂️

Hey y’all,

Before we dive into today’s newsletter, I have some exciting news! My Notion template, Scholar OS, is finally available.

Scholar OS is an all-in-one Notion template helping students achieve their goals and excel in every area of life—including academics, extracurriculars, college apps, finances, and fitness.

If you’re ready to make this your best school year yet, go ahead and grab your copy!

Okay, now let’s move on to this week’s topic: how to care less about what people think.

Humans are mimetic creatures—we align our actions and personalities with those around us. While this desire to feel included and accepted is a great survival instinct, it can sometimes come at the expense of our genuine personality.

Do I care what people think about me? Of course! We all do. But if I let the opinions of others dictate every single one of my life decisions, I promise you that I wouldn’t be where I am today.

And to prove that to you, let me share a little story.

I uploaded Minecraft videos in middle school. Ew. Cringe. (Well that’s what some of my friends thought.)

Immediately after sharing my videos with my friends, I stood at a crossroads: either quit content creation entirely, opting instead for more “accepted” extracurriculars like music or sports, or ignore the light jokes and continue.

With slight hesitation, I chose the latter.

That YouTube channel eventually became a business that I ran throughout middle school and even high school, landing one of the top spots on my activities list.

But look, let’s forget the clout or accolades. In building up that gaming channel, I reaped a more important benefit: self-discovery. I honed my editing skills, found a love for graphic design, and even learned to program. This atypical extracurricular became a way for me to hone in on my passions.

But how do you find that courage to disregard others’ opinions in the first place?

A Small Caveat

The goal here isn’t to ignore others entirely. Your parents, friends, and peers only want the best for you, and their feedback can sometimes guide you in a better direction.

Rather, the goal is to find the confidence to pursue what you love, even if others find it “cringe” or if you might fail. Trust me, I know how scary it can feel to try something new, such as making content, starting a business, trying a new hobby, or even dressing different.

The Golden Rule

One guiding principle I’ve followed throughout my life is “fake it till you make it.” You have to push yourself out of your comfort zone before you can embody your new identity.

For example, when I started Gohar’s Guide, I had to pretend like I was making content for an audience even when I had zero followers. Do y’all know how weird that feels?!

But the longer I made content, the more my audience grew, the more I started to feel like a “real” content creator.

During this process, will you receive the occasional comment or side-eye? Of course! But please, please don’t let it deter you. Your dreams are worth much more than the approval of a single person who might not even know you.

On a happier note: you also need to realize that the vast majority of people aren’t judging you as hard as you think they are. Most of us fall susceptible to the spotlight effect, which is defined as follows:

Find comfort in this fact. Even if you fail or if your plan goes awry, most people won’t notice.

So go out and take that first step towards whatever you want to pursue, because the joy of trying sings louder than the silence of “what if.”

What did you think about this newsletter? If you have a minute, DM me on Instagram (@goharsguide) to let me know!

If you want study help, come join my Discord! We have a global community of students helping each other succeed in school. I’d love to see you there.

And of course, if you’re ready to level up this school year, check out Scholar OS. Your purchase will also help support the Gohar’s Guide channel and the free educational content I produce, so thank you!

I’ll see you next week!

Best,
Gohar